Saturday, January 11, 2014

Closer

I take the pillows off our bed, the same way I have done more times than I remember. But it's different now - now it represents one less night of going to bed by myself.

I hang my towel up after a shower and my heart is filled with joy when I think that it won't be long until there are two towels hanging together again - towels that will mean my love is back.

I brush my teeth and think how wonderful it'll be to get in each other's way as we rinse out our toothbrushes, because it'll mean we are together.

I wake up and smile because it's one morning closer to seeing my hubby waking up on the pillow beside me. It's another day closer to him telling me that I once again stole the blankets and us laughing about how mean I can be in my sleep.

I lay Selah down for her nap and whisper that Mama and Daddy love her very much, and I am thrilled because I know soon her Daddy can whisper "I love you's" to her as well.

I stay up late and finally drag myself off to sleep, and smile because I know soon, my love will be saying "Let's go to bed" when he sees me drifting off.

These days are so exciting as we get ever closer to our homecoming. Each new day is exciting because it's one less that my husband will be so far away. I can't wait!

Friday, January 3, 2014

Precious "Lasts"

There are many precious firsts in my life that I will never forget. Meeting my husband for the first time. Our first hug. Our first kiss. Our wedding day. Graduating from (community) college. Finding out we were pregnant. Meeting our little girl.

But right now, I'm in a season where I am holding dear something a little different - "lasts" - moments that will not come again because my love's return is drawing ever closer. Things like last oil changes, last haircuts, last trips away. Just like our "firsts," these too are sacred. They represent this season apart drawing to a close. And, well, I don't think there's anything more special than that, at least right now.

I look ahead and see exciting days ahead - moving beyond these "lasts" to more "firsts" - homecoming, seeing our daughter's face when she sees her daddy, figuring out all of the in's and out's of reintegration. And there's a part of me that just wants these "last's" to be over with so that I can have my hubby home. The time is drawing so near, and after almost a year apart, I am so ready for our family to be complete again.

But at the same time, I don't want to rush the present. There are still lessons for me to learn - patience for one. There are still moments to savor - snuggles with my girl, my heart skipping a beat when my phone rings and it's my sweetheart, putting together little gifts for my family's belated Christmas. I don't want to miss those.

So, resolution #1 for 2014 is this: breathe. In the stressful moments or in the moments when I don't know every detail about the next step and it's driving me nuts or I really want time to hurry up so my hubby is home....even then, I need to learn how to breathe and savor the present. I don't "breathe" very well. So, this year I am going to try to purposefully do that, knowing that my Abba has all of my "firsts" and "lasts" in His hands.